The 2010 NHL Awards Show took place in Las Vegas tonight. While taking a look at the results, I realized that because the different awards are obscurely named, many of you who are new to hockey might not know what the hell anyone is talking about.

Sure, you know that the Stanley Cup is the championship trophy awarded to the winning team of the playoffs each year, but what the hell does it mean that, say, Chris Pronger is a Norris Trophy winner? Well, here is your guide to all that crazy shit. In alphabetical order, your favorite!

Award	Description	Who the Fuck Is…
Art Ross Trophy	Awarded to the player who leads the league in total points at the end of the regular season	Art Ross?
Bill Masterton Memorial Trophy	Awarded to the player who best exemplifies the qualities of perseverance, sportsmanship, and dedication to hockey	Bill Matterson?
Calder Memorial Trophy	Awarded to the league’s most outstanding rookie player	[Frank] Calder?
Conn Smythe Trophy	Awarded to the most valuable player in the playoffs	Conn Smythe?
Frank J. Selke Trophy	Awarded to the forward who best excels in the defensive aspects of the game	Frank J. Selke?
Hart Memorial Trophy	Awarded to the league’s most valuable player	[Dr. David] Hart?
Jack Adams Award	Awarded to the NHL coach adjudged to have contributed the most to his team’s success	Jack Adams?
James Norris Memorial Trophy	Awarded to the defense player who demonstrates throughout the season the greatest all-round ability in the position	James Norris?
King Clancy Memorial Trophy	Awarded to the player who best exemplifies leadership qualities on and off the ice and has made a noteworthy humanitarian contribution in his community	King Clancy?
Lady Byng Memorial Trophy	Awarded to the player who exhibited outstanding sportsmanship and gentlemanly conduct combined with a high standard of playing ability	Lady Byng?
Lester Patrick Trophy	Presented, in part by the NHL, for contributions to hockey in the United States, but not considered an official NHL award	Lester Patrick?
Mark Messier Leadership Award	Awarded to the player who exemplifies great leadership qualities to his team, on and off the ice, during the regular season	Mark Messier?
Maurice ‘Rocket’ Richard Trophy	Awarded to the top goal scorer in the regular season	Rocket Richard?
NHL Foundation Player Award	Awarded to the player who applies the core values of hockey to enrich the lives of people in his community
NHL Lifetime Achievement Award	Awarded to a National Hockey League veteran in recognition of their contributions to the league; the original was Gordie Howe.
NHL Plus-Minus Award	Awarded to the player with the highest plus/minus statistic in the regular season
Roger Crozier Saving Grace Award	Awarded to the goaltender who has played a minimum of 25 games in the regular season and has the highest save percentage	Roger Crozier?
Scotiabank Fan Fav Award	Awarded to a National Hockey League player based on fan voting.
Ted Lindsay Award	Awarded to the NHL’s outstanding player as selected by the members of the NHL Players Association	Ted Lindsay?
Vezina Trophy	Awarded to the league’s top goaltender	Georges Vézina?
William M. Jennings Trophy	Awarded to the goalkeeper(s) having played a minimum of 25 games for the team with the fewest goals scored against it in the regular season	William M. Jennings?

Award	Description	Who the Fuck Is…
Art Ross Trophy	Awarded to the player who leads the league in total points at the end of the regular season	Art Ross?
Bill Masterton Memorial Trophy	Awarded to the player who best exemplifies the qualities of perseverance, sportsmanship, and dedication to hockey	Bill Matterson?
Calder Memorial Trophy	Awarded to the league’s most outstanding rookie player	[Frank] Calder?
Conn Smythe Trophy	Awarded to the most valuable player in the playoffs	Conn Smythe
Frank J. Selke Trophy	Awarded to the forward who best excels in the defensive aspects of the game	Frank J. Selke
Hart Memorial Trophy	Awarded to the league’s most valuable player	[Dr. David] Hart?
Jack Adams Award	Awarded to the NHL coach adjudged to have contributed the most to his team’s success	Jack Adams?
James Norris Memorial Trophy	Awarded to the defense player who demonstrates throughout the season the greatest all-round ability in the position	James Norris?
King Clancy Memorial Trophy	Awarded to the player who best exemplifies leadership qualities on and off the ice and has made a noteworthy humanitarian contribution in his community	King Clancy?
Lady Byng Memorial Trophy	Awarded to the player who exhibited outstanding sportsmanship and gentlemanly conduct combined with a high standard of playing ability	Lady Byng?
Lester Patrick Trophy	presented, in part by the NHL, for contributions to hockey in the United States, but not considered an official NHL award	Lester Patrick?
Mark Messier Leadership Award	Awarded to the player who exemplifies great leadership qualities to his team, on and off the ice, during the regular season	Mark Messier?
Maurice ‘Rocket’ Richard Trophy	Awarded to the top goal scorer in the regular season	Rocket Richard?
NHL Foundation Player Award	Awarded to the player who applies the core values of hockey to enrich the lives of people in his community
NHL Lifetime Achievement Award	Awarded to a National Hockey League veteran in recognition of their contributions to the league; the original was Gordie Howe.
NHL Plus-Minus Award	Awarded to the player with the highest plus/minus statistic in the regular season
Roger Crozier Saving Grace Award	Awarded to the goaltender who has played a minimum of 25 games in the regular season and has the highest save percentage	Roger Crozier?
Scotiabank Fan Fav Award	Awarded to a National Hockey League player based on fan voting.
Ted Lindsay Award	Awarded to the NHL’s outstanding player as selected by the members of the NHL Players Association	Ted Lindsay?
Vezina Trophy	Awarded to the league’s top goaltender
William M. Jennings Trophy	Awarded to the goalkeeper(s) having played a minimum of 25 games for the team with the fewest goals scored against it in the regular season	William M. Jennings?

(With a nod to Wikipedia).

This entry was posted on Wednesday, June 23rd, 2010 at 9:53 pm and is filed under New to Hockey. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.